ONE O' THESE DAYS I'M GONNA SNAP

It's comin'.  I'm tryin' to stop it.  But when you care SO much for somethin'....you go a little crazy.  Yep, that's me.  I've held my tongue and put in hours and sweat to remain positive on the outside while I'm dyin' on the inside.  Ever have that feelin'?

I've almost "snapped" several times in the past few months.  But I know that when I do it'll all be over.  The hard work...the livin' my dream...the "could'a would'a should'a"  feelings that have kept me here in my little slice of paradise.

Could I snap?  Probably so.  Would I snap?  Maybe.  Should I snap?  Absolutely not.

What's kept me from snappin' up to this point?  My music and bein' able to dance it off.  Kinda like shakin' it off...but I dance it off.

A few years back I found out what depression was all about.  And it wasn't very pretty.  If anyone had asked me if I could become a victim to depression I would have laughed and said NO WAY!  Didn't think I could...but I did.  Woke up one morning with no warning and my world felt like a hole...a BIG, black hole.  I found myself lying in bed for days...crying for no reason I could put my finger on.  I felt helpless...unloved...lonely...and desperate.

There musta' been an angel on my shoulder because when it finally felt like I couldn't go on I picked up the phone and called a friend.  You know who you are.  And you showed up.  It was a simple gesture, but it saved my life.  Of all the folks I could've called...I called you.  And you came through like a champ.  Don't think that I will ever forget that and thanks to you I'm here today.

When I feel like I might slip and sink back into that hole I find somewhere with my kinda favorite music.....and I dance.  If a dance partner doesn't show up...I dance in my heart.  It's great therapy for me and so far, it works for me.

Please don't let the music die...Without the music I can't dance.  And if I can't dance I'm gonna snap!  Dancin' breathes life into me...And when I'm dancin' it's a GOOD me.

We all have that one thing that makes us tick.  Find out what yours is and hold on to it tight.  You never know when it might just be the medicine that keeps you sane...and where your smiles will be real.  

Here's to all of you out there in blog-land that have somethin' gnawin' inside of you that you keep pushin' down.  Bring it up!  Get it out!  Don't wait too long like I did and let it eat you up...Because it will.  Trust me.

My advice?  Get up...Get down...and get FUNKY...get loose ....And call a friend.

 

Now maybe some of 'ya know why I have to dance...and love to dance...

So let's DO it!  Even if you can only dance with the fur kids.

Thanks for droppin' in...while you're here, won't you leave a comment?

CHANGES ARE NOT ALWAYS EASY

 I'm finding that gettin' older has it's advantages...and disadvantages.  I find that I see things in a different light...and just like my grandma, the old ways are startin' to look like they were the best ways...and the best days.  I'll be turnin' 65 in a couple of months and as I look back I remember thinkin' my parents and grandparents were REALLY old at that age.

I don't feel old.  I don't WANT to feel old.  I feel like I'm in the prime of my life...and look forward to many more memories being made with good times and good friends. 

One of the hardest things for me right now is that my favorite place in the world seems to be dyin' out.  A place where I feel like a teenager every time I walk through it's open air doors.  A place where I see folks get excited when they see an old friend walk in.  A place where new friendships are made without asking about what type of work you do or caring about your social status.  A place where the music is hot, the drinks are cold and smilin' faces are abundant.  The ocean breeze floats through the open front and takes your breath away, making me feel invincible...and YOUNG! If you know me...then you know I'm talkin' about the OD Pavilion.

I've lived, loved and played in Ocean Drive for many years.  I've witnessed the end of The Barrel, The Pad and Fat Jacks...places where I cut my teeth on the love and lifestyle that brought me to settle down here.  My heart is heavy that I may have to witness the end of this last place I call home.    

Winter months I crawl through the days with the anticipation for the opening of the ODP in early Spring.  It's open...but not the same.  I have wonderful memories of nights spent in the open air, dancin' away without a care in the world.  The BEST music ever and the BEST folks inside dancin', laughin' and forgettin' our daily trials and tribulations.  The old gal was rockin' mornin', noon and night. 

Best hot dogs, burgers and fries on the beach.  And, the coldest beer!  In the early days the jukebox was never quiet.  Fas' dancin' music was blarin' out over the sand dunes and cool kids would step inside and cut some steps before goin' back to catch some rays...takin' somethin' good to eat and somethin' cold to drink back out with 'em.  The sounds of skee ball and little kids laughin' and playin' in the arcade would always bring a smile.  Sometimes the little ones would saunter out onto the old dancefloor and entertain the regulars trying to copy the dance they were seein'.

The ODP finally opened up this year with a new dancefloor and new faces working the bar.  More folks sit outside rather than inside where the action is supposed to happen.   At this time she's only scheduled to be open on Friday, Saturday and Sunday afternoons...and sits closed, dark and silent at night.  

She used to be the best juke joint for many miles up and down the east coast.  You knew your bartenders and there was always a manager on the floor smilin' and makin' sure a good time was had by all.  The bartenders knew your name and they knew what you drank.  Your drink or beer was either bein' made or sittin' on the bar waitin' for you before you bellied up.  The smell of red hot dogs and greasy french fries filled the air and folks lined up at the Sunset Grill for somethin' to chow down on. 

Yep..the old ways were the best ways for me.  I miss my hot dogs...I miss my bartenders...and I miss the spontaneity of someone sayin'.."hey, let's go down to the pavilion" and always findin' it open....day or night. 

Anyhoo, it's still open.  There's still great DJs with good boogie music.  There's still cold drinks and smilin' faces.  It's up to us to keep it goin'.  That's gonna be hard because the crowds only show up on Sunday.  Yep...changes are not always easy.  But until the doors shut for good look for me at the ODP.  I'll support the changes and try to understand the reasoning behind them.  Just give me some great music and eager dance partners.  I'll survive.  I'm not going to get old.  I'm going to always be young, foolish and happy.  That's what Joe Pope told me back in the 60's and I want to believe it's true.  Changes are hard..but I'm willin' to make the effort if it keeps the ol' girl open.  Will you?

 Worst case scenario...me and the kids will just have to enjoy dancin' at home...Put the music on, BayBay!

Thanks for droppin' in...while you're here, won't you leave a comment?