Remembering Billy Wingate

 

 

 

I'm not drawn to many people...but Billy Wingate was someone I couldn't get enough of.   With a colorful past, full of funny stories and colorful life experiences, I spent many hours sitting with him and always left wanting to hear more.

 

 Received the sad news this morning that Billy passed away last night, losing his battle with cancer, and I find myself hoping above all hopes that someone was holding his hand as he entered his next journey.  A man SO full of life, he spent his last few months lonely and pissed off that he could no longer do the things he loved the most.  Walking down the to the OD Pavilion to see old friends.  Traveling with a dear friend to visit old stomping grounds.  Holding court with the younger ones who loved to hear his stories about Charlie's Place. Playing jazz piano with some of the old black groups, where he would be the only white boy in the place.  His love for beautiful women, all colors of the rainbow.   Sharing his artwork, poetry and music with folks, hoping to ensure that it would carry on after he was gone.  Dancing at the ODP with Janet Morris, classy cane and all.



 

Yep, I'm gonna miss this special man...and time didn't allow me to get the stories that were never told. 

 

Billy was a PROUD man....so proud that he would do without before asking someone to help him.  And when he did allow you to do something for him he would try to repay it twofold with whatever he might have to give.   He didn't want folks to know how sick he was....didn't want to dim the image we all had of him as a strong, full of spit and vigor, pioneer for the lifestyle planted in Ocean Drive that brought so many of us here to live and play.  It broke my heart to see his face when he had to start asking for a little help from his friends.  I saw him starting to break down and fade once this became a necessity.

 

 

So many folks my age would pass him by at the "World Famous" Od Pavilion, sitting on a bench outside...dressed in his starched bermudas, alpaca sweater, fancy eye patch...leaning on his cane in deep conversation with whoever was sitting around him.  And, let's not forget those purty shoes!  Little did they know, or seem to care, that if it wasn't for him, and some of others sitting outside with him, we wouldn't be in OD today fas' dancin' at the ODP.  Please, folks, when you see some of these older guys and gals at the OD Pavilion it is YOUR loss if you don't introduce yourself and sit down to hear a story or two.  You're missing out on why you are REALLY here!

 

 

I never visited Billy at the nursing home in Conway that he didn't either have on his purty shoes or have them conveniently by his feet.  Didn't find him in old boring PJs...last time I saw him he had on his bermudas and a tee shirt proudly stating "I've Survived Damn Near Everything".  No bedroom slippers for Billy...He was dressed to impress and hoping for a reprieve to get outta there.  On my last visit he told me he wouldn't be leaving.  He wouldn't look me in the eyes like he always had, with that dare to defy me strength.  He just sat quietly and let me talk, making a comment every now and then to let me know he wanted me to keep talking.  He was in a lot of pain...but he didn't mention it.  The phone rang several times and he would pull himself together and answer...once again I'd hear that strong, deep voice of his trying to let whoever was on the other end think that he was doing just fine.  On hanging up he'd go back to the frail, quiet man he had become.  My heart was just breaking.

 

 

Somehow I knew that I might not see him again.  All the way home visions of Billy flew through my mind.  Laughing...dancing...telling his stories.  He could tell a story and you would envision him in younger days and see the scoundrel he could be, the fun he had had, the gigs he had played, the people he had met.  When you looked up you'd feel like he was still that young, carefree man.  Billy had a knack for storytelling and unlike some you always wanted "more". 

 

I still want "more".  I hadn't scratched the surface of hearing what he had to say....and I know that he hadn't scratched the surface of telling me.

 

Billy Wingate - tennis player, jazz pianist, artist, poet, fas' dancer, sharp dresser, master storyteller.  I'll miss you, my friend!

 

Until we meet again, Sweet Bill....I'll just keep dancin'

 

 

Since you've dropped in, won't you leave a comment?

 

Bitchin' About The Bitchin'...

 

 

Short and sweet and to the point....that's me...well, sometimes not so "sweet".  I'm gonna bitch about the bitchin' that doesn't seem to stop in my paradise called OD.  I do my very best to get along with everybody.  Don't have a clicque that I belong to, don't have a dresscode I have to follow, don't care if you're a religious fanatic or an atheist....You be nice to me and I'll be nice to you.  Pretty simple.  I'm now a grown-up and if I don't like something or someone I don't have to be around it or them. 

 

 

 

Our once peaceful little community of beach folks are tearing each other apart!  Heck, they're even tearing apart folks and things they know nothing about!  Can't go here, gotta go there....a major "we'll show them" attitude.  Once upon a time folks moved here to OD in the hopes that they could become and share the lifestyle that had attracted them from their high school years on.  There was something for everybody here in OD.  There were rides for the kids...there were churches for folks from all denominations...there were restaurants serving everything from hamburgers & hot dogs to Calabash style seafood.  There was a jukebox in every club and bands playing every weekend.

 

 

 

 

 



 The more folks moved here, the more they wanted to change it to what they thought it should be.  Now there are groups for this and groups for that...and groups against anything that isn't the way they want it.  Now they're fussin' and fightin' and callin' names all over Facebook, and on the streets, about whose idea of what Ocean Drive should be is correct.  You're ALL correct, dammit!  This is a beach community, rooted in beach music, fun and families!  There are plenty of places to hear the music YOU want to hear, whether a DJ is playing it or a band is playing it.  The kids STILL like to ride the rides when they come to the beach.  SO!  You can't park outside the door of your favorite club any time you want to go?  We USED TO WALK!  I've walked from Cherry Grove to Ocean Drive just to hear the music at the old Pavilion, or Fat Jack's....and we HAD FUN doin' it.  And we made MEMORIES.... that tugged at us and made us want to move here. 

Folks....let's all grow up!  Memories are NOT all we have to cling to.  We ain't dead...yet.  Let's make NEW memories...and NEW friends....and realize that there is plenty of room for a little bit of everything here at Ocean Drive!  YES, things change...but bitchin' about things that have always been here and are diverse enough to keep folks coming back and spending their money so we can keep our shops, restaurants and clubs open doesn't make sense to me!  Do you think that the handful of folks with closed minds and hearts can keep downtown business doors open?

Change those frowns to smiles and be glad that you can come to OD, whether on vacay or to live here, and find something that you love to do in whatever door you CHOOSE to walk through.  This new mentality of "MY" people and  "YOU" people is going to cripple what we all came here for in the first place. 

Bless Harold Bessent's heart and soul...He has seen what it takes to stay in business on this beach.  He caters to NO one crowd.  He provides excellent staff, DJ's AND bands so that his club is the fullest one in town on a regular basis.  YES, things change..but the times have also changed.  The rent for a storefront or building on this beach cannot be paid by catering to one small crowd on special occasions.  There have to be people walking through the doors every day...and spending money...and having a good time.  The Fat Man's had the right idea all along.

Can't we all just "get along" without everybody liking the same things?

So you want to make, or have made, OD your home?  Well, please let the kids ride the rides, let the DJs play their music, let the bands play on, let the T-Shirt stores work beside the beach music stores......Let our beach survive!  Instead of constantly bitchin' about the place, either hush up or go somewhere else!

Which direction are YOU goin'?

Some folks have me a titch bothered...can you tell?  Well, I'm just gonna go downtown and dance it out!

 I asked for it...how about a  comment?  But if it's a bitchin' comment fuggettaboutit!

 

 



I'VE GOT A "KEEPER"!

I will never forget the night that my phone rang at midnight and the voice(s) on the other end were dear friends telling me my name had just been announced as an inductee into the Shagger's Hall Of Fame.  The noise and excitement in the background, along with this news, broke my outer shell and I cried like a baby.  Until last night, I thought that was the best phone call I had ever gotten.

At 10:02 last night my phone rang and as a mother I always think the worst, especially when I saw on the caller ID that it was my baby boy, Zack...now 30 years young.  His voice was shaking and I knew right away it was going to be bad.  It started with "Mom, I just got a phone call".  My heart dropped into my gut and I prepared for what was coming.  There was a familiar shake to his voice that I knew well...He was about to cry.  Then it came..."I just got a phone call and they told me they just announced that I am going into the Keepers Of The Dance".  There was silence from both of us for a few seconds, and what seemed a lot longer.  I think both of us were thinking this was a cruel joke.  News like this is meant to be shouted from the rooftops and we were both scared to shout!

After assuring me that Bob Myrick, himself, had gotten on the phone and verified this honor of honors, we both started crying.  Now, THIS turned in to the best phone call I've ever gotten!  Still, as I'm very protective of my children, I waited.....and waited.....

Social media can be so cruel and it can be so sweet.  I sat at my desk and panned Facebook for ANY posts that would say in writing that what I had just heard was really true.  You, see, I have seen my son's heart broken on many occasions.  This is an honor that I know he never expected to get. 

Zack was raised with boogie woogie in  his bones.  He danced in competition from the confines of my womb when I was pregnant with him.  When his father and I taught dance classes he was always in the way, wanting to get in there with the grown ups and move his little feet like we were doing.  At around 5 years old, dang if he wasn't doing a great basic and lovin' our music.  I thought "what a strange little kid I have..he should be out playing with the other kids but all he wants to do is dance!"

Then, it finally came.  Barbara Kiger had announced on Facebook that Zachary McDonald Smith and Ashley Shearin had been announced as the 2014 Keepers Of The Dance inductees!  Once it sank in, I sat on my bed and cried....and my body shook all over.  I'm crying all over again, just putting these feelings to words.

I went onto the web, and although I have looked at the bios posted for each of the Keepers many times, I read them once again.  These beautiful children, who are now adults, have bios that Dun and Bradstreet would post as "gold".  I know each and every one of them and have watched them grow up from the early days of Junior SOS into the adults they are today.  What a fine group of honorees!  Their bios are full of honors and dance championships.  Some of them go on and on with their accomplishments, especially in competitive dance. 

If anyone is to blame for Zack not having a long list of dance honors it's me.  After a few contests where he either placed or didn't place I saw how seriously he took not winning 1st.  Contrary to what a lot of folks think they know about Zack...he's a lot like his mother...we have a problem feeling like we "fit in" and our feelings are hurt very easily.  So, I backed off.  All he has ever wanted to do is dance...and dance he does!  He's survived feeling like he's different from a lot of the other kids, but he's kept on dancing.  It's what he loves and it makes him happy.  As his mother I can say that I have given him hell on more than one occasion because he chose to go dancing rather than do something I thought he should be doing.  I'm not going to apologize for this because I'm his mother and I wanted more than the beach life for my son.  We've had our ups and downs and I must say I'm happy with him just the way he is.  The path he has chosen in life has never hurt a soul...and it's made a lot of old women happy!  LOL!  Yes, he loves us old women..and he loves to dance with us.   His first Junior SOS I was pushing, pushing, pushing him to ask some of the cute little girls to dance with him.  We were at the Boulevard Grill on the last Sunday afternoon and he looked at me, then looked around the room.  He walked up to Ellen Taylor (who he did NOT know or to my knowledge had ever seen before), looked up to her and said "Do you shag?"  I was in terror!  Elegant woman that she is she looked down at him, took his hand, and said "I'll do my best".  As far as I'm concerned the rest is history.  He was hooked like a bream on an earthworm.  From that day on he always watched the dancers and would almost always go up to the women rather than the little girls and ask them to dance.

Zack is a street dancer....that's what I've always called it.  The dance and the music are within him and when the music is right he has to dance....from his heart...and from his soul.

If he asks me to help him with his bio I can only say  "he loves the dance and the music...and all of the wonderful women who gave of their time in the many years past to dance with a little boy who just wanted to dance".  Ellen Taylor, Sandra Schwartz, Louise Hunsucker, Betty "Stick" Kennedy Kane, Jeannie Pack, Jackie Womble, Shelia Bodie, Judy Rodes, Joan Bassett, Leslie Cohen...the list of greats is endless.  These women all played a special part instilling the love of our dance in my baby boy...and I am forever thankful for their kind words of encouragement and the many hours that they spent on the dance floor with him.  Some of these women are no longer with us but I know that they will forever be in Zack's (and my) heart!

I know that there are photos out there somewhere of Zack with all of these great ladies...I just can't find them.  I would especially like to have a photo of him and Louise Hunsucker...he loved her SO much!

Anyhoo, I just want to say how happy I am to see him recognized by his peers and he is going to be a Keeper Of The Dance.  I'm very proud to see him included with so many great juniors that have grown up keeping our dance alive! 

I love you, Zack...and you'll always be my baby boy!  You and Ashley Shearin are in for a fabulous year...and I'm proud of you both!

 Signing off for now....Just had to shout my happiness to the world.

Almost time for the music to start at the Pavilion!  So...........Why don't we just get together and dance this thing out?

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